I’m hosting our December Sanity Retreat for this week, but I will be delaying my post until Monday or Tuesday, because I just am not in the right mindset for the topic I had chosen.
I’m acutely aware of the sadness, and my own desire to find ANYTHING to distract me from the fact that there’s such sorrow that things like this can, and did happen. Sometimes it feels like it would be too overwhelming to sit with the enormity of such loss, because it’s more than I can wrap my head around. And yet to some extent, sooner or later, we have to. When I choose to ignore the big beast in the room, I tend to spend my time aimlessly, and it’s exhausting, too.
I’m a sensitive person, and it feels like I can sometimes “absorb” the trauma around because I tend to deeply empathize. I’m sure I’m not alone there. I honestly don’t know the best way for me to find some way that feels authentic to acknowledge the huge suffering that so many are experiencing, either directly, or by proxy, as most of us are right now.
I am encouraged that finally THIS tragedy seems to have motivated many people to call for action NOW. Sometimes it takes something truly terrible to jolt people awake. I can only hope that this will be the silver lining of this all.
I know this is touching most people very deeply and all I can say is that I am so sorry. Please do take good care of yourself. At the end of the day, the best way to honor anyone who has lost their life is to live yours fully.
Thanks for this post, Cheryl. Words seem completely inadequate for this situation, and I often wonder when I acknowledge one tragedy, but not another (such as the Portland tragedy a few days ago) if I do a disservice to those folks lost. These losses are just so horrific and beyond comprehension. Stepping away for a while and remembering to embrace life fully seems like the only reasonable thing to do. But I do sincerely hope, like you, that something good will come out of these events.
xo,
Shirley
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